Aloha...

I'm quite glad I didn't post my last blog because after some rereading I realized it wasn't all that readable. Thats not to say this one will be.

Something seems to have been bugging me for a while, and I couldn't pinpoint it. I've been feeling inconsistent for the year, getting emotions all across the board but with no real reason for getting moody. In the few days, I've come to the conclusion its not one major thing bugging me, but a whole host of the little things thats getting to me. There are the obvious big stressors like exams, but its not just exams. Knowing I have to write them sometimes irks me as much as writing them. And its gotten so hard to want to study since my first semester ever. I'm just tired of well... being tired. If nothing big is getting to me, and its just small things... then WTF? Life could be worse.

I'm tired of a lot of the things I do. Like not working hard enough on the things I should be. I'm really tired of doing things half assed. There are way too many things where I just haven't pushed when I know I'd get on someone else's case for not pushing in the very same instance. And I've got to realize working hard does not mean time spent on something. Working intensely as opposed to running the clock does not yield the same result... If I'm only going to spend an hour on something, it better be a damn good hour now.

I've also been wondering about the debate between genetics and environment (and/or your own will I guess). Now, I'm not going to argue which is more important because I've always thought of an analogy one of my more interesting courses had: Which is more important for music? The person, or the instrument? Its hard to tell because when one of them is missing, there is no music at all. Are you going to make choices because you are predisposed to a certain type of personality? Or does being brought up and being in certain demographics affect the way you make decisions too? ( Such as being brought up in a royal family would mean I'm a prince...) However, since I haven't read about a surefire way to predict every individual's choice in every event, I'm sure we have enough free will...

Also, don't you ever wonder what would have happened if you did choice A instead of choice B say 2-3 years ago? Just one little change in your life could potentially alter everything in the upcoming 10 years. For the people that truly say they've lived a life without any regrets, I don't know how they can do that. I know I've looked back and regretted certain actions, maybe wishing I had risked instead of holding back. Perhaps you're just better off not dwelling on them. After all, you never can know if you truly would have been better off on that tangent. Its like poker, don't dwell on the fact that you didn't stay in and win a pot, how are you supposed to know what cards come out next? But yeah... somebody should invent an alternate dimension machine so I can see what happens.

After briefly looking back at the above paragraphs, maybe it seems that theres a lack of control. Right now I'd like to think I'm having an internal outlook where what I do affects things... but do I sound confident that it works that way? I know its what I do that affects my grades, what I put on my resume etc... but I think I am feeling a lack of control somewhere. But where?

One step closer to inner peace? o_O we'll see

Aloha

Hey, does anyone want to play badminton at the pavillion? Like say... Thursday?! I don't have class, and a cool plan would be to badminton it up, then study, then go home. Minus the study part of course.

Oh yeah, thanks to everyone that was able to come out on such short notice on Saturday. Overall it was good, considering me and Larry weren't actually creating a mutual list of invitees. And that the restaurant changed like a half hour in advance (Go Dantes!) Thanks to Team Dev for the cake, Megan for use of her house, Delia for the sweater, everyone who provided rides, and everyone who was able to come out. Wait, I already said that last part already. Meh, I'm sure you had forgotten with that sentence in between.

Anyways, lets check out some funny hockey team logos!

Goto www.nhl.com and vote for the Edmonton Oilers to beat Calgary. I have no idea how it jumped to Calgary beating Edmonton, because before it was like 70-30 in favour of Edm. F*ck the '89 Flames...

Aloha

We'll see where this blog takes me.

Its back to school and my classes are the following: Physiology 210, Health Education, Psyco 233, Occth 106 (communication), and Rehab 250. So far its been 3 days and I haven't done much yet in any of the classes, so I can’t really comment how it has been so far.

I’ve been reading some rants on http://www.outpostnine.com/editorials/ and they are friggin funny! They’re kinda like the rants you envision yourself typing out, except don’t. I don’t necessarily think that way, but I still find it funny. Don’t you ever wonder how universal the concept of the “friend zone” is?

These are things that I’ve done and I wonder if other people do them too:
- When you see a girl, without knowing anything about her, just for about 3 seconds size her up and imagine what you two would look like as a couple.
- When you meet a guy, size him up and see if you could take him in a fight. I think of a strategy for about 3 seconds until I realize I’m being stupid (Besides, I don’t need a strategy, I’m that good).
- When you are talking to someone and you want to bring up a certain topic so you can impress that person. You try to think of ways to bring up that topic so you can brag, but at the same time come off as humble. Then finally you manage to bring it up, it gets an “oh cool”, then the topic gets dropped and forgotten like broccoli on the floor for whatever reason.
- When you don’t feel like talking to someone, but you see them walking toward you. You look away and try to time it so that you give a greeting in passing. Then you look back and totally miss that person. Now you feel like a jerk for not saying hi. Jeez…
- When you don’t know what to do, so you analyze your situation. Now, you look at your first few choices and decide not to take them because of obvious setbacks. However, you’re still looking for a perfect choice (like a perfect move in chess). Eventually you end up reaching a choice, and it turns out to be one of the original choices you rejected, but forgot it sucked because you took so damn long.
- When you have lots of time to arrive somewhere early, but then decide to set it so that you arrive with zero waiting time. Then you get distracted by something sharp or shiny, and arrive late. Good job!

Thats all for now, and if this appears disjointed, its because I didn't reread this and typed it at various points in time. Damn I'm lazy...